Forgiveness

As often happens, I was in church to hear exactly what The Holy Spirit has been trying to make me understand: forgiveness. I am not a forgiving person. I am not proud of it, I just had to accept it today. It stems from my inability to feel forgiven. Say what? Well, it breaks down like this: regardless of the fact that all my sins, yes ALL, were forgiven when Jesus died on the cross, I still don't feel like that is enough. Now, since we humans tend to "weigh" sin, I can say that mine are not "large" or "inexcusable". Yet as sin often does, they press on me because satan knows if he can keep me feeling unforgiven, I won't be able to forgive others, my hurt, anger and wounds will fester, and I will be one miserable gurl more apt to sin than before. He is a jerk. 

 Sometimes I wonder as I pray for forgiveness for a past sin "one more time" if God is laughing or crying. Laughing at my simple mindedness or crying because He gave his son so that my sins would be forgiven and I could live in eternity with Him, and I clearly think my praying for forgiveness is what really tips the scales. I'd say tears are falling. When I realized today how ignorant I was about my own forgiveness, I had a hard time keeping the tears at bay. I am overwhelmed by God's grace and mercy, but in this moment more so by His forgiveness!

I would never have said I needed forgiveness, yet I was praying for it daily, and rarely covering the current day. Satan loves keeping us in the past, and not the warm fuzzy past... We are all born to sin. Sorry, but no matter how cute the pictures are, each of us is born a sinner. Thus, we will all have to fight to avoid sin and accept God's forgiveness when we do. What we can't do is wallow in it. Sin is sin for a reason. It costs us something. It always costs something. Some consequences are immediate and some take longer, but they are there. Don't allow satan to exacerbate the consequences by keeping you in the dark about your own forgiveness! 

 As ugly as sin is, it slides right off us in God's eyes. Once we believe we are saved for eternal life through the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross, we join a mighty fold. I only hope to successfully teach my children about forgiveness. It will change their lives!

Choices

This is a simple one. All my conscious life I've never understood why our society allows one to circumvent consequences by offering more choices. Shouldn't those who didn't make healthy/prolific choices be given some breathing/growing room before making another?

More specifically, I'm confounded by abortion. Remove the case of a child, molested, raped, or just uneducated about sex. Consider the more rampant situation: an adult - defined as one who has reached the legal driving age or above, as this is widely the age at which society accepts sexual activity as being healthy and normal - who has consentual sex. The most obvious "consequence" is pregnancy. Now, at this point said person has exercised their free will in choosing to have sex. Pregnancy, STD, HIV, etc. are known concrete possible results of this chosen behavior. Then, said person is not expected to move forward with the pregnancy consequence if they choose - again - not to. This time the choice is at the expense of a being that was created through no choice of its own and will now be "terminated", again through no choice of its own. Doesn't this scale seem skewed?

Now, were the consequence STD or HIV, society puts on a sad face and hovers around to support said person. WHAT!? Where was that support when the consequence was pregnancy? What a sad statement our actions as a society make about our emotional/psychological mentality!

Considering rape, incest, molestation and any other circumstance that may result in pregnancy without the person's choosing to participate, I sincerely believe that God himself through His Holy Spirit will give said person more support than they will ever need, while not removing the consequence, still turning the consequence into something good. However, I also believe that God, as stated in His Word, gives us complete free will, and would forgive and support said person even if abortion was chosen because they were never allowed to exercise their free will when the pregnancy began.

And that my dear, is why I started this blog. Thus, these are today's twelve cents... :-D

and the countdown begins...

That's right! We are officially taking our first family Disney World vacation! Of course, the kids don't know yet, so it's a BIG secret for now, but Mama and Daddy are getting PUMPED...

Where'd he go?

Yes. When sitting on a curb watching my kiddos ride bikes - one with training wheels and one without - I about lost my lunch when a CRAZY spring "breeze" almost knocked me over. Then I looked down. Not far down. Just to my knees. There they were. Two caterpillars - one on each knee - and I had an idea: Let's raise these suckers!

Well, lots of Google research and leaf testing later, we had it figured out. Thanks to Gran and the bug habitats - ok, jars basically - we had them set up with watered branches - carefully watered so they wouldn't drown - and lots of climbing twigs. Then, after 4 days, while cleaning out cages - and MAN, do these things ever POOP! - I discovered my son's was deader than dirt. So, I waved madly to my husband for help and we positioned the dead thing back in the cage to buy some time to find a replacement.

We ran to the garage, grabbed bikes, and went back to the spot where we found the originals. Praise the Father, there were three right there! I put one in the playdough container and got it back and in his new home before anyone had even noticed their parents were gone. SUCCESS! W e l l... I thought they could use a little "fresh air" - there are holes and slits in the top of the cages - so I left the tops off while we went bike riding. (We grownups just got bikes for the first time in 20 years, so we're WAY excited for any chance to ride.) Guess who also went on a trip?

Yup. The newest LIVE addition decided to make a run for it.
So, now we have an empty cage, a loose wormy fuzzy thingy, and soon a sad little boy if I can't figure out how to get out there and get another "replacement" without him finding out... GEEZ! We should've just let him find the first one limp, said some prayers, and flushed it! I'm too old for this... ;-}

History merely repeats itself.

It has all been done before; so says Solomon in Ecclesiastes 1:9. (New Living Translation) How true! Matthew Henry comments: "Men's hearts and their corruptions are the same now as in former times; their desires, and pursuits, and complaints, still the same." (Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Bible) Funny how we can be made to feel, by satan himself it sometimes seems, that no one else has EVER suffered, grieved, wanted and been denied as much as we have. How silly I am! I am comforted in knowing that satan has employed no new tactics for me. I am able, through the power of Christ, to defend myself against all evil attacks.
Another verse in Ecclesiastes caught me: "As you enter the house of God, keep your ears open and your mouth shut."(5:1). I have so much more to learn than to impart. May I remember to listen and learn first.

"Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God."
Ephesians 6:14-17

Once again, the sun is up before me!

I must say, I LOVE the "fall back" part of Daylight savings time! It's dark at night and light in the morning... I believe that's how it was begun in Genesis? ;-D
We had our family holiday/Christmas card pictures taken yesterday. They DO get easier. The bribes may get more expensive and time consuming, but the photos are worth it! My how these kiddos do grow...
There is no news and I am a terrible blogger, but since it's just for me... I'm taking it easy on myself... Time to get our holidays scheduled so I don't get befuddled come December!

The times they are a changin'...

Where have the days gone? I'm sitting here, working on a fun spreadsheet, listening to the lull of rain falling fresh from the heavens. How clean it so suddenly seems! Alas, I am hungry and so are the minions... what? the sun's coming out? Kids, you're on your own... I'll be at the pool... ;-D.